Following the publicity caused by ‘Anonymous’, Scientologists took to the street to set the record straight and offer free stress tests to passers by. I had mine done, it was life changing. I’m now a scientologist.

I’d like to clear up a few myths about scientology. For one, it is all about helping people - that’s it; it’s a wonder why so many people take issue with a force for good by spreading vicious lies.

Secondly, for the people who say bad stuff about Scientology - I have one thing to ask you; what are you hiding from?
Yes, you know what I mean, what are you running from? Tell me about your crimes, tell me about your stash of paedophillic images and drugs and about murder, there must be something.

I remember my first reading.

A man sat me down and asked me to hold two metal batons which were rigged to what looked like a big plastic acme voltmeter and said as he fine tuned the intrument ‘think of something, anything at all’. . .

and I thought I’d have a bit of fun so I thought of myself absolutely relaxed laying on the beach with my hands cupping my head on the deck with a big smile on my fa. . . ‘THERE!’ he interrupts, that thought RIGHT THERE.. .

- He had detected a change in the meter and wanted me to hold the image in my mind. I didn’t expect him to then ask me what the image was, at which point I replied ‘I was on holiday’  - all the while he’s staring directly and intensely into my eyes and it’s clear at this point he was attempting to monitor my eye positions, presumably having studied some elementry neuro-linguistic programming at a scientologist seminar and so I gave him all the cues he expected and agreed when he suggested I had negative memories associated with the image. I didn’t but he wanted to believe it and I let him believe it - it’s all about helping people, you see.

These guys Anonymous, they’re responsible for some of the worst crimes of the century so I wouldn’t pay attention to them. I am bidding on e-meters on ebay now.

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